It doesn't really matter much any of those things that we put so much stock into. Think about it, all those thoughts and fears that roam around in our busy lives, guiding us in subtle, unknown ways. Does he like the dress I'm wearing? Does she think I'm stupid? Why is he angry? Why can't I be successful? What will they think? Why can't I do better? I understand now in my heart, none of that truly matters. It is not that I believe in emptiness or unhappiness, on the contrary. I think when each of us truly face our fears and dare to let them go, we will know in our heart that all that matters is that we trust and believe in love. When death comes and most likely it will, both in the metaphorical and literal sense, we'll know that choosing love is all that really matters.
It is my story, anyway. I meditated today on the meaning of all the everyday life entanglements and disappointments that I experience now and again and I thought what is the meaning of all this really? It seems such a waste of energy, and it seems, so many people are controlled by their stories and hurt, not just me. It is a collective epidemic. All these dramas really seem to matter to us, but on a much deeper level it doesn't really matter so much, and that is quite a liberating thought, so much that it put a huge smile on my lips as I simultaneously thought, what is the matter with me? Ha ha. But the thing is that when I choose to have an experience of love and free myself from anything that fear has produced, I know, no really understand that I am free, and I can easily choose love in any given situation, whatever is thrown at me.
There are two forces in the universe: love and fear. Every day I think we have the opportunity to pick which one we want to be the motivating factor in our dealings with people, situations and decisions. Love opens and frees us up to positive changes, fear closes us down and leaves us vulnerable to negative change or stagnation.
How do you chose love? How do you know what love is? Fear, it's opposite, from which hate, shame, anger, guilt, pride, greed spring, feels like (if I were to try and explain) something that contracts you from the inside, something that makes it hard for you to smile. Love invites in smiles, creates an expansion, hope, air to breathe. When you feel fear, you know deep inside, if you are completely honest with yourself. It stiffles you. The courage you need is to become aware of the moments fear shows up inside, once you look into its face, you can make a decision to change your behavior, by smiling instead of being angry, for instance. If there were love, how would that change your circumstances? Now decide there is love always, how does it all feel like now? To help you move from the challenging experiences of fear to a more joyful experience, one of the most effective tools is movement, dance or exercise. Move those blockages out of your body, release them through physical movement. It is quite simple, but first you need to become aware of the presence of fear in you. And I think it is important to practice faith that love is always there for you to tune into, no matter how dire it all seems, no matter the drama and the challenges. Love is right there for you to face, and it is a peaceful face full of kindness and acceptance of you.
"There are three gates of liberation if you like, three cities much like the ones associated with the Goddess you have been named after that unites the chemistry experiment: the material, astral and causal. You get a chance to mix those together in your alembic and boom a wedding of chemical proportions is what we are looking at."
"By impulse, she looked above her. On the branches of the peppermint tree, birds had gathered. In the invisible spaces that she could see when she called herself back to the state she had been in at Helena’s house, she saw beings smiling to her. They had gathered around Kama and Lalita, wherever there was space. She could see their faces at the very back of the garden, where the star jasmine spread its stems. With the sound of the birds above and the earth vibrating underneath, she knew they all urged her to let go, to feel the earth and sky sing to her, to let her take in the glory of it all."
